Dir: Craig R. Baxley
Year: 1991
Cast: Brian Bosworth, Lance Henriksen, William Forsythe
Genre: Action/Crime
Cert: 18
In the decade of controversial violence, this film was one of early entries that earned itself an NC-17 and promised plenty of violence... it fucking lied. Craig R. Baxley, stunt coordinator for the action/sci-fi/horror masterpiece, Predator, directs this steaming pile of rectal sauce and earns himself a shame point. It follows a tough cop who doesn't take anyone's shit, Joe Huff (Brian Bosworth, Aka - An absolute nobody who failed horribly with his movie career as well as his football career) who has recently been put on suspension due to his unorthodox ways of taking down criminal scum. A biker from a gang of evil misfits decides to shoot a priest with a shotgun for no apparent reason whilst he's doing a christening. But it's forgivable cause it looked funny and it's only a priest. The biker's sent to prison, but that pisses off the second in command of the gang, Ice (William Forsythe) so he blows up the judge who sentenced him and is ready to take down another judge who is trying to put him on death row! The FBI approach Huff and blackmail him into going undercover in the gang and taking them down from the inside and eliminating their leader, Chains (Lance Henriksen) and stopping the murder plot against the judge.
Shitty bollocks this is. Utter, utter fucking tripe. Mucky, terrible, pissy, cunty, pants. With its promise of ultra violence I was very excited for this, I knew well it would be a dumb as fuck action movie so I definitely went in with the right mindset. But this garbage didn't deliver! Practically no violence throughout, which I later found out was because the shit they cut to get an R rating was cut for good! So there won't ever be an uncut version of this out, which doesn't really bother me because I dont want to ever see this shit again. It began so strong too. Three absolute textbook baddies barge into a supermarket, shotguns fucking blazing. In walks Huff, ultra casual, sporting a fucking blonde mullet that even the most hardened lesbian steteotype or southern white trash redneck wouldn't have the balls to wear, a trenchcoat and what looks like a dreamcatcher earring. He effortlessly kicks the shit out of them and spews the line "You got a clean up on aisle four", followed by hilarious bassy music. He's then at home making breakfast for his pet komodo dragon, then a priest being blasted through a stained glass window. This all happens in about 5 minutes so myself and two friends were amped up for a cheesy, bloody thrill-ride! Little did we know, there would be fucking nothing happening for about half an hour!! Just bikers playing pool, shooting cans and having severely homoerotic wrestling matches in sand pits for money.
We were patient though, we know the NC-17 levels of violence were yet to come. It was before the L.A. riots too so it wasn't just America throwing the rating around from fear like they did with just about any movie that had gun violence. More pool playing and pointless drama goes by until a firey bike chase ensues! And ends almost immediatley... then more shit until the ultimate climax! Helicopter fights, shootouts in court, this was it!!! And then it was buckets and buckets of NO violence... a cop is mangled with a machine gun and then literally people start dying off screen... this was NOT what I "paid" to see! All of the camera-work and acting was of abysmal quality, so bad that Brian Fuckface earned himself a Razzie nomination. Bet the cunt didn't even show up to the awards. It was sad to see both Henriksen and Forsythe lend their talent to this garbage, they're both great! There's a completely unnecessary romance too which doesn't aid the plot on any way, it was just obligatory in action films back then. I will give it some plaudits though, it had great explosions and stunt actors. They both seem redundant now days. Explosions are CGI and so are the fucking actors! Lone Survivor brought it back though, legendary that was! The on set photographer was great too cause all of the IMDb images look great and enticing but none of the shots are in the film itself. Biggest disappointment of the year so far!... Was better than the end of Dexter though...
Also there is a poster that is an incredibly misleading knock-off of the Terminator poster. This film has NO cyborgs! Unless you count Bosworth's acting. Someone also said this was better than Terminator 2... to that person I say, you're a fucking moron and the doctor should have smacked your ma for having ya!!!
Here it is:
Great poster, atrocious film.
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